It’s the ipad’s Fault our Kid Will Not Make it to the Summer Olympics

Our beautiful, intelligent, spunky, 20 month old Miss M LOVES our ipad.  What toddler wouldn’t?  The only times she uses it are to watch episodes of Dora the Explorer, her all-time favourite show or to FaceTime chat with Daddy when he’s working late, her out-of-town aunties and cousins.  What’s not to love?

That being said, the ipad is a bit of an addiction.  Little Miss M cannot be in the same room as the ipad without wanting to hold it, touch it, use it.  She loves it.  She doesn’t use it a lot but when she does, she is the happiest toddler in town.  I make a lot of references to Miss M watching shows on the ipad.  Truthfully, she does not spend all of her days glued to an ipad.  She runs, she plays, she climbs, she breaks stuff, she builds stuff and everything in between.  I certainly do not hook her on to the ipad for days on end.  My reason for saying she watches Dora on the ipad is because we don’t have cable television. GASP!  (I know!  How do we survive?)  We weren’t sure how we would survive without cable either but quickly realized that with two babies, we rarely watched TV anyway and when you have two babies back-to-back (AKA no time to work in between to qualify for a second maternity leave pay), you make small sacrifices to make it work, financially.  Cable television was an easy one for us.  It’s amazing how much more productive you can be without having a TV to channel surf on and back-to-back shows to keep you entertained and allow you to lose track of time.  We still watch TV.  We have a Netflix account.  We had an “Unblock Us” account which essentially gave us a US IP address so we could stream US Netflix which has a wider variety of shows but we cancelled it.  Not because of money.  Because of Dora.  Dora is on Canadian Netflix but not US Netflix.  I don’t know how those US mamas do it because sometimes I need Dora to help me out for a 20 minute episode so I can deal with a cranky, crying, 9 month old Mr. C, make lunch, dinner, brush my teeth, etc.  So we’re back to Canadian Netflix.   Long live Dora the Explorer!

We also livestream when we need to (want to) watch something live.  I just watched every second of  Canada VS. USA in Olympic Men’s Hockey while both babies napped at the same time.  (Way to go Canada!  #Sochi2014)  However, I watched it on my laptop with our big screen TV turned off beside me.  Yes, we have the whatcha-ma-call-it cable to connect the latop to the TV but it’s just me, watching hockey by myself while both babies are sleeping at the SAME TIME.  And, I’m too lazy to move the fence from around our TV and hook up the doo-hickey to the thing-a-ma-jig.  (I could easily land a job in IT, as you can tell!)

Anyway, back to the ipad.  The ipad is great for having Dora “on the go” or in Miss M’s bedroom when she has a sore mouth from cutting 4 teeth at once and won’t settle down and go to sleep.  A 20 minute episode of Dora captivates her attention long enough for her to stop protesting being in bed and allows her to fall asleep.  Dora is the first discography I have ever purchased on iTunes.  I am the proud owner of ALL of Dora’s songs…as well as seasons 1-3 on video.

Recently, Miss M has showcased her ability to unlock and open the ipad.  We have never shown her how to do it.  She is just extremely observant.  She presses the middle button and then swipes her finger across the bar to unlock it.  Hubby and I were both flabbergasted the first time she did it.  We have decided she is a genius, will be a software developer when she grows up and all kinds of other crazy, amazing things.  (We are fully aware that Apple makes their products so user-friendly that a chimp could operate them but come on!  A 20 month old figuring this out with no direction?  Genius!)

While Hubby got Miss M ready for bed the other night, she pressed the button at the bottom of the ipad, slid her finger across to unlock it, pressed the “Video” icon and then played an episode of Dora.  How crazy!  He figured it was a fluke and closed it down to see if she would do it again.  The joke was on him because she threw the fit of the century because he took Dora away from her!  Truth be told, she did it again.  Nobody comes between Miss M and an episode to Dora.  I’m a recent Apple user.  I swore I would never own an iphone.  I was devoted to Blackberry.  I can now see the late and great, Steve Jobs’ (founder of Apple) tapping his fingers together saying “Muahahaha” knowing I have switched.  When you have kids, you take boatloads of pictures and videos.  I find Apple to be easier for taking and sending these pictures and videos…plus there are so many great apps.

Miss M’s ability to use the ipad has had its down times though.  On Christmas Day, I was getting Mr. C into his adorable, tiny dress shirt and Christmas plaid tie while Miss M entertained herself on the ipad waiting for her turn to get dressed up.  As I pulled Mr. C’s corduroy pants up, I heard the familiar ring of a FaceTime call being called.  I looked over to the ipad and saw a name I didn’t recognize as the recipient of our FaceTime call.  I disconnected it and later, asked Hubby how he knew this person.  He explained that she was the manager of one of his suppliers at work.  “Oh.”  I replied.  “Why do you ask?” he questioned.  “Oh… because Miss M just FaceTime called her… on Christmas Day.  Sorry!”  Hubby has since deleted his contacts from the ipad.

A couple of days ago, Miss M was running around with the ipad while I dealt with a disastrous explosion of a poop in Mr. C’s diaper.  I was listening intently to make sure no FaceTime calls were made and didn’t hear any incriminating sounds.  When Mr. C was finished, I changed Miss M and put them both to bed and didn’t open the ipad again until the next day when I figured it needed a charge.  I opened the ipad to see it was open to my Facebook account, on the page of Miss M’s new gymnastics club.  Okay, fine.  She opened my facebook.  With it being Family Day weekend, I had checked the club’s facebook page Saturday morning to make sure classes were still on as scheduled before I brought her to her lesson.  She must have just pressed the icon and landed on the page.  Nope.  As I looked closer, I saw that an image of tiny gymnasts had a box beside it that said something like “Tag Request sent for ____________” with Hubby’s name in it.  My heart sank and I almost threw up.  Miss M had managed to send a request to tag my husband in a photo of little girls that we don’t even know.  (Damn you Apple for making your products so user-friendly!)  As I thought more about it, you only have to tap a photo once to open it and tapping it twice invites you to tag someone.  Because I always tag Hubby in pictures of our kids, his name is the first selection.  So all she had to do was hit it 3 times to tag him.  Wow.  This is embarrassing.

I quickly googled “How to remove a tag request” and figured out that if I hovered over Hubby’s name waiting to be approved to be tagged in a photo of random children, there will be an option to remove the tag request.  I did it.  Phewwf.  However, Miss M did this over 24 hours ago so it’s quite possible the gymnastics club has already seen it and thinks we’re the crazy parents.  Crap!  She’s only been to 2 lessons and we’re already the crazy parents!  No!!

I crept downstairs and told Hubby what had happened.  He was not happy.  “I don’t want the gymnastics people thinking I was wanting to see pictures of little kids I don’t know doing gymnastics.  They’re going to think I’m a diddler!”  Yikes.

I went back upstairs and sent a facebook message to the gymnastics club explaining what had happened and apologizing.  I told them (not in these words) that we are not diddlers but were just embarrassed parents who should be paying more attention to what our daughter is doing when she is playing with the ipad.

How embarrassing.

Conclusion:  As much as Miss M loves it, she might have to quit gymnastics.


andbabymakes3imean4 is one mom’s adventures while tap dancing on the brink of insanity with 2 babies, 11 months apart.  If you liked this post, please follow my blog or like my page on facebook to be the first to know of future posts.  Thanks for reading! xo

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