Tonight I am writing this blog while lying on the far side of my bed so I am out of sight to my sweet little two-year old who is crying at the baby gate in her doorway. My heart is breaking but I am trying to stay strong. If I bring her into bed with me like I did last night and the night before, it will become a habit that we will not be able to break. A habit sort of like watching an episode of Dora the Explorer on the iPad from her crib when she isn’t feeling well which has now become a part of her bedtime routine. It is Miss M’s iPad. I know it. Hubby knows it. She knows it and even 14 month old Mr. C knows it… But he is willing to fight for that iPad. (We may need to invest in a second one soon.) Miss M can navigate through that iPad without issue. She knows how to open and play a video. She swipes her way through photos. She can open her preschool apps and play games.
Here’s a funny digression: Last weekend, Hubby and I were at a wedding and my parents were watching the babes. I was in a deep conversation with the woman sitting next to me (about our kids… Obviously… Because that’s what mommies do when they are out sans babies… They talk about their kids, compare war stories and show pictures.) Just as my new-found mommy friend and I are realizing that her daughter and my son were born 2 days apart, Hubby taps me on the shoulder and says “You’re face timing me.” No I’m not.. I turned back to my conversation only to have him nudge me again, this time with his phone in his hand showing me the call display which shoes my name making a FaceTime call. My phone is in my purse under the table! There’s no way I am facetiming you! By the third nudge to show the third FaceTime call, I realized that I am signed in to itunes on the iPad at home. (How else would I access my newly purchased Bubble Guppies series?) My parents would have put a show on it for Miss M when they put her to bed and she has reached it and has placed a FaceTime call to hubby. Answer it! I exclaimed. This is hilarious! After a couple calls and baby babble, Hubby called my parents to let them know they might need to take the iPad away. Amazing. Anyways, like I said, that was a huge digression but well worth it.
So here I am hiding out in my bedroom trying to be present enough for Miss M to know I am close by but distant enough that she doesn’t throw a fit wanting me to bring her into bed with me. She is standing at the new baby gate in her doorway with her sippy cup and blanket in hand, ready to be rescued. Last night, Hubby and I were sitting on the living room couch chatting while both kids were in bed when suddenly we heard someone run across the hall into our room. There was no thud. No sound. Just little feet running and then a little voice exclaiming “Mommy!!!” When she didn’t find me in our bedroom, she proudly ran down the stairs towards us. It is official. Miss M has figured out how to climb out of her crib. I feel responsible. This week I was just talking about how she climbs in her crib and in and out of her little brother’s crib but has never tried to climb out of her own no matter how much she is protesting bedtime. This has now changed.
We tried to put her back into her crib at least 27 times… Each time she would climb back out and run out of her room. She also ran right into Mr. C’s room to wake him up at least 4 times. This was not good. In order to keep her contained (and Mr. C undisturbed), we put a baby gate on her doorway. It was too late at night to convert her crib to a toddler bed. So we gave in and brought her to bed with us. She slept soundly between Hubby and me. At one point, she flipped upside down and had her feet touching Hubby’s face. Tomorrow would be toddler bed day.
The next morning I woke up with soaking wet pants and all I could smell was urine. What the heck! I have been battling a kidney infection for the past couple days. I have had to pee so frequently that I had to make a “pit stop” at Burger King on the way home from picking up my prescription. I made it to the washroom just in time. As I washed my hands, I figured I should probably buy something to justify my toilet usage… But I really didn’t want anything there. So I ran back out the door like a weirdo and jumped into my car and peeled out of there anticipating the entire staff to come running out to chase me down. I felt like such a rebel. I’m badass, I know. Anyway, as I woke up soaked in urine (there’s a sentence you don’t type everyday,) I wondered if I had peed myself… Until I turned and saw Miss M sleeping like a baby (haha yeah right! That expression is so ridiculous and ironic!). Anyways there she was, sleeping like a daddy (that’s more like it!) and she had peed through her diaper and pajamas and on to my pajamas. She had wet the bed… in our bed.A wonderful way to start the day.
As I cleaned up Miss M and myself and stripped our bed linens, Mr. C woke up screaming at the top of his lungs. I opened his door to the worst stench ever expecting the hugest poop ever in his diaper but he was just wet. That is a lot of gas for one little dude. Boys are gross right from the beginning. The poor little man was hot with fever and miserable. He is cutting his molars and has been suffering. As I fed he and Miss M breakfast, Hubby excitedly took Miss M’s crib wall off and assembled the big girl toddler safety guard for her to try out this afternoon at nap time.
When nap time came along, we made a big deal out of Miss M going to bed in her “big girl bed.” We cuddled her in and told her how proud we were and wished her sweet dreams. Miss M did a lot in that 2 hour time frame. Sleeping was not one of them. She read books, ripped one book apart, emptied her toy bin and sat in it, pulled the register out of her vent, threw her blankets all over her room and even managed to pull the toddler safety guard off of her bed and throw it across the room. I told Hubby that they really should make them so they screw into the crib frame. He said it was screwed in. She pulled the part that wasn’t screwed off of the part that was. I don’t see this piece being our best option.
With no nap and a very busy day, Miss M was exhausted by the time bedtime came around. She cried in the bath tub because she just wanted to go to bed. Once she was out of the tub, she curled up on her big girl bed with her blanket. I diapered her and dressed her in pajamas as she laid there sucking her thumb. I had a feeling she would have no trouble falling asleep… And she didn’t….
…Until half an hour, seconds after I had finally got a cranky and teething Mr. C settled in to sleep when she fell out of her bed. Crap. She was terrified. I picked her up and comforted her and knew I had to do something or else she was going to fall out again and again all night. I was so mad at myself for being naive enough to think she wouldn’t fall out.
Hubby had gone out. I called to see if he could come back to relieve me for half an hour so I could run to the store and buy a better safety guard/bed rail contraption. No such luck. I could bring Miss M with me but I really didn’t want to have to wake Mr. C up after he had just settled to drag him out to the store. I called my mom and she came over to snuggle with Miss M while I went on a late night toddler bed mission. On a Sunday night at 9pm, Walmart was my only option. Ugh. Walmart did not have any safety guards or bed rails but they did have toddler beds. Cheap hunks of plastic available in either Disney’s Cars or Disney’s Minnie Mouse in order to force you, the buyer into defining your child by gender and making sure that no two brother/sister siblings can share anything. I read the “Easy to Assemble!” label on the boxes, grabbed the Minnie Mouse toddler bed and lugged it to the cash register. $70 for a hunk of plastic with a Minnie Mouse sticker on it. Miss M doesn’t even know who Minnie Mouse is… ah well, if it helps her to get some sleep, it is worth every penny.
I brought it home and my mom helped me to assemble it while Miss M ran away with the screwdriver every single time I needed it. We put it together and she was so excited. We brought it upstairs and put her crib mattress on it and she was even more excited. She hopped in and snuggled in for the night. Success! Phase 2 of “Miss M’s first night in a big girl bed” begins now!
Twenty minutes later, she was up, she was screaming and she was scared. I got her up again. She wanted to lie on our bed but there was a problem; our bed was not made because until this very moment, as I was ready to turn in for the night, I did not remember that all of our linens were still soaking wet in the washing machine from the pee incident of this morning. As Miss M screamed and followed me from the linen closet to our room, I quickly made up our bed with spare sheets and then tossed her on it. She sighed an instant sigh of relief. I brought up a cuddle of fleece blankets since our duvet would not be dry anytime soon. We cuddled and watched an episode of Bubble Guppies. When we got to the second episode, I kissed her on the head and then sneaked into the bathroom to have a shower. It was now around 11pm. I had to get up at 6am to go to work and had a feeling I was in for a long night. If I wanted to bathe, I needed to do it now. As I rinsed the conditioner from my hair, I felt the odd feeling that someone was watching me. I opened my eyes to the excited shouting of “Mommy!” Miss M was standing outside of the shower, blanket and sippy cup in hand, excited that she had found me with one foot over the side of the bath tub in attempts to climb in with me.
I got out of the shower, got dressed and then pulled the rocking chair next to Miss M’s new toddler bed and tucked her in as she cried. I reassured her that I was right here and read her some books. Then I tiptoed out of her room and closed the baby gate behind me.
Miss M leaped out of bed and screamed at the gate “Mommy!” Which brings me to where I am now where I am a prisoner in my own room trying to stay strong and not give in to her. She will be fine. This is a big step. Approximately 20 minutes later, Miss M was quiet. A few friends had shared stories of their little ones falling asleep at the gate in their door way in the first few days of transitioning from crib to bed. I figured she was asleep. I quietly shimmied across the bed to peek across the hall expecting to see her sweet little body curled up fast asleep. I was caught completely off guard and couldn’t help but laugh when I looked across the hall to see her still standing at the doorway, wide awake holding her sippy cup and her blanket. She yelled “Mommy!” with a big smile on her face when she saw me….and then we started all over.
After lying on her floor next to her toddler bed for an hour singing songs as she laid in it making sure I didn’t leave, she finally fell asleep. 12:30am. Here’s hoping this is the last time. I pulled myself up on to my knees and crawled out of her room, shutting the gate behind me and collapsed on my bed. Within a minute of me lying down, I heard a key in the lock of the front door. So did Miss M. As Hubby opened the front door, Miss M jumped up squealing “Daddy!” I tried not to cry.
Miss M was out of bed and at the gate hoping Daddy would rescue her from her room this time. Hubby spent about 5 seconds trying to tuck her back in before deciding that he would just bring her into our bed. Nice try. Nuh-uh. Not happening. I would have done that approximately 5 hours ago if I wasn’t afraid of creating a habit that we would never, ever be able to break. We both went into her room and started all over. Miss M fell asleep and we tiptoed back out of her room. I thought I was going to collapse with exhaustion. I stumbled across the hall and pulled a fleece blanket from the couch downstairs over myself.
Hubby followed me into our room and then turned the light on and asked “Do we not have a comforter or anything?”
andbabymakes3imean4 is one mom’s adventures while tap dancing on the brink of insanity with 2 babies, 11 months apart. If you liked this post, please click “subscribe” or follow my page on facebook to be the first to know of future posts. Thanks for reading! 🙂